Example of a Mary-Sue

[Athena]

Name: Alis Aiko Storm M'kmaq Rayven Aphrodite Hunter, also known as "Death"
Age: 29, appears about 16
Gender: Female
Weapon(s): She doesn't need them because of her ninja-awesomeness.

Faction: The Court
Job: Being princess, of course. Previous jobs before she found out about her royalty included: Model, rock star, actress, dancer, cop, ninja, pirate, alchemist, bounty hunter, mercenary, assasain, thief, outlaw, diviner, hero, artist, freelance writer, freelance reporter, explorer, and gymnast.

Romantic orientation: Heterosecual

Appearance: Ridiculously attractive. Has violet eyes, which are Special and Important which will be revealed throughout the course of this roleplay. Is thin enough to be considered anorexic. Has wings.
Attitude: Noble. Genius. Is fluent in seventeen and a half languages. . Has a Sonambulist twin, and a faithful pet dragon. Has an amazing singing voice. Plays guitar, bass, violin, flute, and piano. Was trained to use a katana.
Notable History: A terrible disease wiped out most of her family.

Reputation: Known as being an all-around good person.

((This would have been longer, except I became bored.))

[Scout]

Lydia, thank you. You have made the profile which everyone can look at so that they know exactly how not to make a character.

If you seriously intended to use her, I'd advise completely overhauling the character. She is a complete Mary Sue. Literally. You fulfilled all four criteria for a Mary Sue.

1. (S)he is devilishly attractive to all members of the opposite sex. It's okay to be attractive, but there's a point where it becomes too much.
2. (S)he is liked by everyone, opposite sex or not. Nobody is liked by everyone.
3. (S)he can survive anything with relative ease. This sets them apart from most video game characters in that video game characters work for their victories.
4. (S)he is a "lore-child," or (for example) a half-demon half-elf half-dragon demon-slaying "badass" with wings. This is an extreme version and should not be taken literally.

Snow is laughing over my shoulder as I type this. As this profile was made by a staff member, it's obviously impossible to reach a truly unanimous decision, but both Snow and I have decided that this profile is completely unsuitable for use.



In addition to all this, you failed to meet the requirement of 200 words for the personality and history.

Congratulations. You have earned the red stamp of death.

[Snow]

I really hope you were joking about this character, Athena. I really hope you were.

To add to what Scout said about the 200-word thing, the entire profile comes out to 154 words.

[Howl]

Give her hemophilia!

[Glassmage]

Th- this is sad. I'm sorry, Athena, but this looks like you used the criteria for a mary-sue and used them as guide-lines.

[Athena]

Actually, to be fair, I didn't. I used a Mary Sue Litmus Test for Original Fiction. She scored a 146.

--71 points or more: Irredeemable-Sue. You're going to have to start over, my friend. I know you want to keep writing, but no. Just no.

If you want to try, go here -- www.springhole.net/quizzes/marysue.htm

I really hope you were joking about this character, Athena. I really hope you were.

Snow, you had doubts? I feel offended.

[Snow]

This topic is being stickied as an example of a Mary-Sue in its prime.

[Scout]

EEEPIIIC FAAAIIIL.